October 21, 2008

We randomly co-slept with Elliot. I enjoy it, having nothing against it, but it just wasn't for us as a full time option. Felix, on the other hand, is making it a full time demand. He and I don't sleep well otherwise.

We have a queen size bed and it is a tight fit for me, Jay and Felix. When you add in Elliot and his kicking feet and pinching fingers in the morning, it gets claustrophobic. Jay sprawls when he sleeps. And he's a deep sleeper. He's also said he doesn't fully trust himself not to clonk Felix in the head or whatever. (He did inadvertently pull the blankets up over Felix's face, but I woke up because he was fussing.)

My back is killing me. With Felix in the bed, I feel I am hugely restricted in my sleeping positions. I am on my left side 90% of the night. And I'm contorted. I nurse laying down and I don't switch positions when I switch sides - I nurse from the top boob. (Felix won't nurse well on that side if I am in the typical position.)

I think if I had more room, things would be much, much better. But we don't even have our spare bed anymore. It's our bed or nothing. I could make Jay sleep on the couch, I guess... but then he wouldn't be next to me for me to wake up when Elliot comes in the room or needs me while I'm nursing.

I've been putting Felix in the middle as it's safer for him to be between us, because Elliot can come in the room at random times in the night and I'd be scared he'd arrive and pull Felix off the bed. Plus, I like to sleep on my left side (which is ideal for nursing, for me) and the only way to do that is with Felix in the middle. Jay won't give up his side of the bed, which would be better for me if I could shimmy it up against the wall. It would take some major moving around of our tiny room. I want a king size bed, but it would take up the whole space and not leave room for bureaus. Blech. )

We have a cradle on my side of the bed, where Felix would spend the nights, at least until recently. But he would wake every 1.5-2 hours then. In our bed, he wakes every 2.5-3.5 hours. I need that extra sleep!!!!! There's no floor space for Elliot. Only at the foot of the bed, but then I'd trip over him on my way out of the room.

I could get rid of the cradle and add the co-sleeper bed thing, but a) it wouldn't give us extra room space and b) I would have to sleep on my right side to nurse, or roll of to my left with him and remember to roll him back to the sleeper after nursing - not always possible.

It's a head scratcher.