September 24-25, 2008

Elliot woke up with blue lips this morning. They stayed blue during and after breakfast. His hands were cold, but fingernails looked normal. (Not pink, but not blue at all.) His tongue and gums looked normal, too. Breathing wasn't laboured, but he was coughing a lot. Jay gave him his puffer before breakfast.

I know this is generally related to lung problems - respiratory due to illness (cold, asthma) but can also be a sign of a heart problem.

I took him to daycare anyway, but let them know about it. It didn't raise any flags with them and they said they'd watch him for me.

I'm 99% certain this is related to his nasty cold.... buuuut should I take him to his dr? The ER? Wait and see? I'm usually a wait and see kind of gal, but I don't want to risk my kids health, of course.


Felix, on the other hand, sounds more laboured and wheezes a bit (more snuffly than wheezy) when he breathes and his skin colour is good. So far. Baby coughs are so pitiful sounding. Breaks my heart.

~~

Well, I called a pharmacist and she wasn't instantly alarmed, but said it would be good to get him checked out. She did check the inhaler he's on to make sure it wasn't a possible side effect.

We don't have a nurse line to call, but I did call out dr's office. Front desk suggested I bring him in to the walk in clinic tonight so they could check him over and make sure he was breathing ok for overnight. She said it didn't sound like a rush thing, but still a 'better to be safe than sorry' thing. I agree. So, I'm getting ready to go pick up Elliot from daycare a bit early and we'll head to the clinic.

~~


Dr said he's fine. He didn't know what caused the blue-ness, but said he's healthy (aside from the cold). Lungs, ears and throat are clear. Skin is completely normal colour now, of course.

So it's a mystery. I don't like mysteries when it comes to my children.

We'll keep an eye on it.

~~
25th

Blue again this morning.

The doctor - an ancient dude - didn't check E's blood oxygen levels, which is something I expected. I'll call the children's hospital, I guess. Last time I called them about something, they told me that unless he was a patient or seen my them already within the last 24 hours, they couldn't advise anything over the phone. To go to the ER was best option if I was concerned.

I know that by the time I arrive there with both kids, Elliot's lips will be normal and they won't find anything wrong and will make me feel (again) like a over protective first time mom.

The fact that his lips return to normal is a good sign. I'm thinking it's a temporary oxygen saturation thing while he has this cold - he had a big coughing fit this morning. The really promising sign is that they're not as blue as yesterday - only a deep red/purple today and a purple/blue yesterday.

His room has been colder than usual, so that could be playing a part. I actually turned the heat on this morning, it dropped to 64 degrees in the house last night, colder in Elliot's room as he has 2 outer facing walls and his bed runs along them.

September 23, 2008

I finally had my specialist appointment this morning - after waiting almost 7 months!

It was at 9am and I had to be there at least 10 minutes early. We don't have a car, and it was a full 40 minute walk away, so we bundled up the kids and managed to get out the door just after 8. (I did most of the prep work last night - a good thing, since both boys decided to sleep until nearly 7:30. Elliot had his breakfast in the stroller!)

We got there exactly on time. I checked in and they sent us to the empty waiting room. There were toys and books, so Elliot was excited and we didn't need the ones I'd packed. Felix slept in the Ergo the whole way there (on me) and then we transferred the Ergo to Jay and Felix fell back to sleep after we got there.

We waited, and waited, and waited. In a now very full waiting room. After more than half an hour, Jay decided to take the kids outside since I still hadn't been called in and I was told my appointment would take about 30 minutes, so we bundled them back up just as they called my name. The dr came in, checked my chart, felt my throat, looked down my throat and made me laugh to check my vocal cords (which run behind the thyroid)... then he said he couldn't feel a nodule and would book me for another u/s to check things out.

I was out of there within 5 minutes and then couldn't find my family - Jay's phone was turned off (even if it had been on, he'd given my his backpack while he had the kids, and his phone was in there.) So I walked randomly around the block until I luckily stumbled upon them.

So it seems that it was only pregnancy based (which is weird, since I didn't have any thyroid issues with Elliot) but, if I do have another pregnancy, I guess my chances of developing another nodule and/or lingering thyroid problems is slightly higher...

So, I'm feeling pretty good... just need to wait for the u/s for absolute confirmation, but I think I'm in the clear.

After my appointment, I took advantage of my hubby being with us and we went to Starbucks before walking him back to his office. Where, of course, all the production staff cooed over the boys and Elliot ran wild and then the producer came out of her office (broke up a meeting especially for us!) and then put on one of their shows for Elliot to watch (which made him very happy. Afterwards he tried to negotiate for "One - one more show!!") and then she took off with Felix when he woke up and had him grinning and babbling as she sang theme songs.

Changed both boys, nursed Felix and got him to drink the 2oz bottle of milk I barely had time to pump this morning, then we came home just in time for Elliot to pitch a tantrum because he wanted yet another snack before lunch. In the end, he decided he wanted a nap instead.

September 18, 2008

Elliot has a low fever again today. (About 100). he's still happy and playing, but he's more clingy and moving slower than usual.

He's been curled up in "daddy's chair" with a few stuffies and a blanket watching TV, but then he'll say "All done. Play toys." Which means he isn't totally zonked.

His face looks a bit puffy, his eyes are running (clear), his nose is running (clear) and he's drooly (also clear, and this could be snot, I guess.) He also has a cough and his voice sounds strangled. If it's the same one I had/just getting over, his throat is probably killing him, too. But I didn't have the drippy nose/eyes.

I'm pumping him full of liquids (watered down OJ in a sippy with a straw is a big hit!) and letting him watch TV so he gets some "rest"... he had Motrin before bed last night. .It was an early bedtime because of a no-nap day... but it took him a while to fall asleep and he was up in the night several times.

If he were more congested, I'd be running the shower for steam, etc, but for now he seems ok (we'll do that at bath time).. I'll try to make a chicken soup today.

Ugh. And tomorrow we're having a bunch of kids over for our weekly "Story Time" - but it's a special birthday themed one and we'll read birthday themed books and eat birthday themed cake. Saturday is a big family birthday brunch and a small party with a big cake and one of his closest friends. *sigh*

September 17, 2008

Poor little muffin... they called me to pick Elliot up from daycare. He had a temp of 101.8, which is 1.3 above their "limit", and his nose was draining green gunk. unfortunately, he fell asleep before I got there (They called me at noon, I got there just before nap time was supposed to start)... so with a 5 minute nap under his belt and a drippy nose, I'm sure today will suck. tried to put him down for an hour and then gave up. he's watching tv now. maybe he'll fall asleep in his chair. once he's out, then Felix, my other crappy napper, will hopefully stay asleep, too. He's been napping in 10 minute bursts. with shrieking in between.

Oh, and Elliot's temp when I got him home was only 99.something. So either our thermometer is off or theirs is off, or they took his temp after he was running around outside. his nose is still a faucet, but temp is down for now, i guess.

September 15, 2008

Elliot hasn't shown much interest in nursing, beyond holding it in his mouth for a second. Last night, little boob got incredibly engorged and painful and I've been afraid of blocked ducts/mastitis so I've been using hot compresses and expressing some in between feedings and while nursing on the other side, I'll let it hang out and drip free. This morning, didn't Elliot come along as I nursed Felix on the couch, declare he wanted mama milk too, and latched himself on! Never really thought I'd be tandem nursing...

September 10-12, 2008

So the last few nights, when Felix wakes for his first night time feeding (generally around 3 am, so usually 5 hours from the last one - our only good stretch!) His diaper is usually VERY dry. Like maybe 1 pee. Last night, I didn't even change it until 5am, and even then it was still super dry. I was getting concerned, but then the next diaper change was wet. Is this normal for a baby so young? He nurses like crazy. Is this a growth spurt time again - I didn't think so... but I don't remember anymore.

And he's also started sleeping like crazy in the day. I'm loving it, but I'm starting to be a bit concerned, too... he'll nap for 1-2 hours, have a short nursing session, maybe a change, then drift off again. Before this, he would be awake (and fussy!) for sometimes 2-3 hours at a time. I thought that was abnormal, too.

To the best of my recollection:
10th
5:30-9pm - Dozed, nursed, fussed (no solid block of sleep, maybe 15 minute catnaps)
9pm - changed, nursed to sleep by 9:30
11th
3am - nursed - dry diaper, no change, asleep by 3:15
5am - nursed - dry diaper, changed, asleep by 5:30
7:30 - awake, nursed
8am - changed wet, poopy diaper
8:15 - asleep in swing
10:45 - awake, nursed
11:15 - asleep in Ergo, transferred to swing at noon, still asleep now at 1:15, but starting to stir...

I like his night time sleep schedule, so I'm worried all this day time sleep is gonna screw us up!!!!

He had a great check up yesterday, so if it is something to be concerned about, it's nothing noticeable during a check up (not visibly sick, etc)

~~
3pm - I woke him up, nursed/changed
3:30 - asleep in stroller
4:15-5pm - dozed/fussed
5pm - nursed
5:45 - poosplosion
6:15 - asleep in reclined highchair
6:45 - awake, fussed, mini-nursed, screamed until 8
8pm - changed, nursed to sleep by 8:30
12th
12:30am - awake, nursed, changed
1:15 - asleep
4am - awake, nursed, changed
4:45 - asleep
7am - awake, nursed, changed
8:30 - nursed, changed (ClothDiaper)
8:45 - asleep in Ergo
9:30 - awake
9:45 - changed (CD)
10am - nursed
10:30 - asleep in swing
11:15 - awake and pooping
11:30 - changed (CD), nursed, nursed, nursed
12:15 - asleep on mama
2:30 - awake, nursed, asleep, transferred to swing

September 10, 2008

Had our 6 week check up this morning. She thinks that the lingering carpal tunnel symptoms I'm having should start to dissipate in another 2-3 months (!!) once the post-partum hormones settle. Ditto the quasi-post-partum-depression symptoms I've been having. BUT she gave me a prescription for anti-depressants and I'm to follow up with her in a month.

As much as my boys need their sane, normal mother back, I'm hesitating filling the 'script. For one, I've read conflicting things about BFing while on it. Not to mention, we no longer have drug coverage and it's not cheap. But I'm thinking that with Elliot in daycare 3 days a week, I won't have 2 needing me 24/7 and will be able to rest a bit more. That alone might just get rid of all my PPD signs.

I've been having odd bladder/hoo-ha issues, so she checked me out and did a PAP. Good news is that I don't appear to have a UTI or a yeast infection. But she did a swab to see if I have any unusual bacterial growth. I'll get the results in a week or so.

And I got a prescription for the mini-pill. I took it after Elliot and did well on it - no huge plummet in my milk supply, a drop, but nothing major.

*sigh*

Felix had a good check up. He's a BIG boy!!! 13 lb 14 oz and 23 inches. 95%/90%. And his 'magic spot', unicorn horn is definitely a birth mark. She figures it will fade by time he's 5 yrs. I hope to - it's hard to see exactly where his hair line is, but I think it's just under it.

September 9, 2008

Ok, I'm in desperate need for new clothes. I've been watching "What Not To Wear" a lot lately, since it's on during Elliot's nap time when I'm trying to get Felix down, too. So, in a fit of determination, I packed away all my mat clothes. So I'm down to a pair of jeans, 2 pairs of yoga pants and a skirt that I can wear mostly comfortably. And a bunch of ratty looking tanks.

And I pretty much hate them all. They're all from pre-Elliot's pregnancy, so they're old. And boring. But, I don't have time to go shopping and also don't know what to buy. I want to buy nice stuff that will last and that will suit my body type. On the show, they're always talking about buying high quality, form fitting pieces. Well, anything 'form fitting' makes me sweat. No matter the fabric, no matter the brand/medium of deodorant/antiperspirant. I sweat buckets through anything and it's gross and embarrassing. So my old wardrobe consists of tanks with old cardigans over them. Great for nursing and hiding pit stains!

September 9, 2008

Elliot is finally starting to show concrete signs of becoming ready to potty train. He's been sitting on it for a long while now, though he still prefers to be fully clothed.

The other day, he started making all his toy dinosaurs go pee and poop on pretend container potties (totally his idea). Then they wash their hands and go have a snack! It's pretty cute. He's becoming more aware of when he poops, but he's not yet able to tell me before he starts. This morning, when I was changing a super huge poop in his room, he tells me that he pooped in the dining room, which he did. So the awareness is growing.

I guess the next step is helping him learn how to take his clothes off so he can help himself?He will sit there, naked after a bath or whatever and read a book. Today, we sang potty songs. He's peed on it twice, but that was before Felix was born.

September 5, 2008

Elliot starts on Monday - man, that happened fast.Right now, I'm relieved and excited. But I'll bet you anything that come Monday morning, I'll be a basket case that my baby is going. It's only 3 days a week, I need the respite, and it's a very short walk from home should anything happen, but still...

He's been on the waiting list at this daycare for a year - since before I was prego with Felix! At that point, I was going back to work part time and figured it would help to have him somewhere. Now I need him somewhere, for my own sanity. But I feel guilty about it already.

September 4, 2008

I don't know what happened today. The overall picture of it seems fine - we spent lots of time outside, I got errands and laundry done. But it sucked. I wasn't motivated. Could barely function or get dressed this morning. Had zero patience with the kids. Smacked Elliot's bottom on more than one occasion. Sent him to his room, even. Locked him in his room again at nap time - today it was 1:40 before he fell asleep.

He's cutting a molar. Oh joy! And he's over-tired all the time because he won't fall asleep until 9pm and wakes up at 6am. He looks exhausted all day and then fights me come nap time.

I called Jay at work in tears because I couldn't handle myself around Elliot. This isn't me. I don't know if it's sleep deprivation or post partum depression or a combo, but I'm not me and my children deserve more than they're getting. I even called the MOM program, the depression study I participated in last time around. I was still in tears, but thankfully Elliot was asleep by then so I could talk, but they initially told me I didn't qualify for the program again. (!!!) But the woman was concerned about me so she had their psychologist call me back. And she looked into things and talked with the program director - apparently, in the 2 years the program has been in existence, I'm the first repeat. They hadn't put that into their protocol, so now, thanks to me, they're going to revisit that part. Because really, aren't women who've previously had PPD more likely to have it again?!

Anyway, so that made me feel better. And the director has accepted me back into the program.

So I was brainstorming way I could get the help I need with the boys. I thought I'd try to find a mother's helper for a few weeks, maybe 15 hours per week, just to help out with nap time (I need a baby holder so Felix doesn't scream while I'm trying to put Elliot down) and someone who can do the dishes.

Then we get home from our walk and I check the messages and find out that a space has opened up for Elliot in our first choice daycare!!! YAY!!!!! I can't wait for tomorrow to get here so I can call them back for details.

Now I just need to have a shower and go to bed.

September 3, 2008

Ugh, so Felix has taken to screaming for hours at night. At first he had a witching 'hour' from 7-10 where he would be fussy but consolable. Well... last night takes the cake! He screamed uncontrollably for hours. From 7:30-11 when he finally passed out. It took 2 doses of cocyntal (a homeopathic for colic/gas), countless half-hearted nursing sessions (he wants a milk flavoured nipple, not a milk dispensing one, I guess), two walks around the block in the Ergo, lots of bouncing on the ball and finally a double whammy of skin-to-skin and upside down nursing on Little Boob and he was out. He slept on me, on the couch until 3am when my back/neck couldn't take it anymore and we gingerly went upstairs.

Jay snapped this after he finally passed out:

Note the lovely birth mark that's getting darker and darker on his forehead. When he was born, we joked that it was where they cut off his unicorn horn. I figured it was either a stress point from where he was lodged in my hip for so long in the last weeks of the pregnancy or that it would turn into a raised hemangioma birthmark like Elliot has on his back... but so far, it's just hanging out, maybe getting a bit darker but not becoming raised, which is a good thing, I guess. It looks to be just below the hairline, so maybe it will be hide-able when he's older, if it doesn't fade.

Oh, and happy anniversary to us!