December 7, 2008

We were in the nursing room at Sears, and they've recently added another recliner so more moms could be in there at once. I've never run into another mom in there before, but this week, it was a parade! Anyway, I'd just finished nursing Felix (the other mom came in just as we were sitting down) and then Elliot started asking for mama milk. We generally only nurse one per day (in the morning) and I tend to try to discourage him if he asks at other times... except now he's taken to saying, very petulantly, "But I said PLEASE!" if we ignore him or say no to a request. So I gave in, I figured, why not? And told him he could have just a bit of milk. So he latched standing up and sucked for about 10 seconds, then unlatched and said thanks...

I felt weird - I've haven't BF'd him outside of our house in over a year! (Not a conscious decision, it just happened that way...) Not weird as in 'I'll never do it again.", but I was worried that the other mom would be judging me or something. She didn't say anything - but I didn't really look at her to see if she was looking at me oddly.

Then again - I was at a party today where someone was nursing a 4 year old... not my thing, but I found myself judging her. Bad me.

November 29, 2008

We were in the hall the other night and heard Elliot say "Baby needs milk!" When we went into the livingroom, this is what we saw:



Last night, Elliot changed his baby and then said he needed to carry it around, so he dragged out the Ergo, but it was too big. So this is what Jay came up with:

Then, he nursed his baby again and wrapped it in a blanket and curled up with me and a sleeping Felix on the couch to put his baby to sleep! Too cute!

October 21, 2008

We randomly co-slept with Elliot. I enjoy it, having nothing against it, but it just wasn't for us as a full time option. Felix, on the other hand, is making it a full time demand. He and I don't sleep well otherwise.

We have a queen size bed and it is a tight fit for me, Jay and Felix. When you add in Elliot and his kicking feet and pinching fingers in the morning, it gets claustrophobic. Jay sprawls when he sleeps. And he's a deep sleeper. He's also said he doesn't fully trust himself not to clonk Felix in the head or whatever. (He did inadvertently pull the blankets up over Felix's face, but I woke up because he was fussing.)

My back is killing me. With Felix in the bed, I feel I am hugely restricted in my sleeping positions. I am on my left side 90% of the night. And I'm contorted. I nurse laying down and I don't switch positions when I switch sides - I nurse from the top boob. (Felix won't nurse well on that side if I am in the typical position.)

I think if I had more room, things would be much, much better. But we don't even have our spare bed anymore. It's our bed or nothing. I could make Jay sleep on the couch, I guess... but then he wouldn't be next to me for me to wake up when Elliot comes in the room or needs me while I'm nursing.

I've been putting Felix in the middle as it's safer for him to be between us, because Elliot can come in the room at random times in the night and I'd be scared he'd arrive and pull Felix off the bed. Plus, I like to sleep on my left side (which is ideal for nursing, for me) and the only way to do that is with Felix in the middle. Jay won't give up his side of the bed, which would be better for me if I could shimmy it up against the wall. It would take some major moving around of our tiny room. I want a king size bed, but it would take up the whole space and not leave room for bureaus. Blech. )

We have a cradle on my side of the bed, where Felix would spend the nights, at least until recently. But he would wake every 1.5-2 hours then. In our bed, he wakes every 2.5-3.5 hours. I need that extra sleep!!!!! There's no floor space for Elliot. Only at the foot of the bed, but then I'd trip over him on my way out of the room.

I could get rid of the cradle and add the co-sleeper bed thing, but a) it wouldn't give us extra room space and b) I would have to sleep on my right side to nurse, or roll of to my left with him and remember to roll him back to the sleeper after nursing - not always possible.

It's a head scratcher.

September 15, 2008

Elliot hasn't shown much interest in nursing, beyond holding it in his mouth for a second. Last night, little boob got incredibly engorged and painful and I've been afraid of blocked ducts/mastitis so I've been using hot compresses and expressing some in between feedings and while nursing on the other side, I'll let it hang out and drip free. This morning, didn't Elliot come along as I nursed Felix on the couch, declare he wanted mama milk too, and latched himself on! Never really thought I'd be tandem nursing...

August 28, 2008

Elliot just came up to me and asked for mama milk and then added... "like straw!" because I've been trying to get him to remember how to suck to get the milk and so I tell him it's like a straw or a soother. So we nursed for all of 4 seconds. Then it started letting down and I was dripping everywhere and he backed up and told me to "turn it off."

Oh dear!

August 1, 2008

My milk only just came in...so I'm crazy engorged. I want to help it regulate even though I know it will on it's own...

I had to block feed with Elliot, 2 feeds per side before switching. Felix cluster feeds during the day (every hour, which I guess is standard for a newborn!) but will sometimes go 3 hours. The last 2 nights, he's gone 4 hour stretches. He usually nurses on one side and then falls asleep. I change him to wake him up and have been waffling between putting him back on the same side to finish the feed afterwards or offering the other side. That second feed doesn't always happen and isn't usually that long. So, overnight, I could go 7 hours without nursing on one side and man, does that hurt!!!

It's almost 7:30 now. He nursed on the left side around 2 pm and had a monster feed on the right about an hour ago so I don't expect him to nurse again for a little while. The left side is so engorged it hurt to touch it. I'm considering pumping to relieve some pressure, but I know the can of worms that can open up...

May 11, 2008

Elliot was sick with nasty head cold a few weeks ago. For a whole week, he only nursed once, because he couldn't breathe. He started demanding bottles. Once he could breathe again, he had a marathon nursing session (20 minutes - abnormally long for him, he's usually done in 3-4 minutes) and then didn't ask for it again for several more days. We're averaging nursing once a week now. Sometimes he'll ask for it when I get home from work, but when tell him he can have it before bed, just to see if he *really* wants it, he's ok with that and then, come bedtime, he doesn't want it and actually says 'no' when I ask.

So, I think we're weaned. Or just about weaned. Or taking a break. Or whatever!

Although, he likes to pull up my shirt to kiss & hug Boo, and the other day he pulled it way up and grabbed my boob and said "milk". I told him that the baby was going to drink the milk, too. He looked a bit concerned, I could see his little brain figuring that one out. Luckily, since he's only been nursing on the left side for the last year, I had a solution - I pointed to his side and said "Elliot's milk" and then to the other side and said "Baby's milk." He seemed happy with that!

Due to the pregnancy and the nursing once per week thing, I have next to nothing left, but he does seem happy enough to "dry nurse", I guess now and then, I guess. I suppose this counts as weaned... it's certainly the longest he's gone without nursing. We'll see what happens when Boo arrives!!!

March 29, 2008

Thursday afternoon, Elliot was in a really foul mood. I came home from work early because Jay was sick with a migraine and Elliot was a raving lunatic. He nursed for a good 15 minutes (unusually long for him) around 2pm and sort of calmed down. We nursed again, briefly, before bed Thursday night.

We *may* have had our final nursing session yesterday morning, but I don't actually remember doing it. I worked last night, so Jay gave him a bottle and put him to bed. He didn't ask for milk this morning, so off to work I went. After his bath tonight, Jay read him a story like always. Then he high-tailed it into his room, like always. But then as we sat down in the rocking chair, he grabbed his soother out of my hand, plunked it in his mouth and we just rocked and sang songs. He didn't ask and I didn't offer milk. I haven't heard him for about 20 minutes and I think he actually went to sleep...

I guess it's finally time. I'll give it if he asks, but I think we might have just weaned!

February 4, 2008

My trifecta: I'm 16 weeks prego, nursing a 16 month old who has 16 teeth fully through. This can't be good!

Seriously, my nips are killing me! It hurts to nurse now.

12/18/07

First appointment with the baby doctor today! I got called in right away - I was in the loo leaving a sample, actually. Was in the office for nearly an hour. She took my history again (mostly was able to copy from last time!) And she weighed me - 149 lbs.

She tells me it's now strongly encouraged for preggers women (at any stage of the pregnancy) to get the flu shot. I've never had one before and don't really want to, but told her I'd think about it. She didn't pressure me, but said that it was a good idea to have it. And one for Elliot as well. Not sure how I feel about it.

She was also surprised that I'm still nursing and said it's recommended to stop. I told her I'd researched it and was comfortable continuing, but she said that it couldn't be determined how many nutrients were going to the developing baby (and to myself) if I was nauseous and throwing up AND nursing a toddler, even if it's only 3-4 times per day. She's also a bit concerned because I've lost 10 lbs so far... of course she won't truly be concerned until/unless I lose more by the next appointment. Which I don't think is going to happen... but we'll see. I'm sure that if I've lost more weight by the next one and am still nursing, she won't be impressed.

But otherwise, a good appointment. No dating ultrasound, but she said we'd just go with my last period date for now and if the 20 week scan shows a smaller baby, then we'll assume I did ovulate late and push back the due date. As of now, I'm due July 19th. (The Fertility Friend software says the 17th. It had also calculated Elliot's due date as Sept. 18 and she said Sept 16th... I think there's a leap year coming up which is throwing off the dates a bit. Oh well...close enough!)

We tried to listen for the heart beat, but we both knew it was really early. We did hear placental sounds, so that's encouraging! My next appt is mid Jan, so we'll be able to hear something then for sure. And hopefully you can come, too!

Then we went to the library and to Woozles and then for sushi. (Elliot ate 3 veggie rolls. Including the seaweed on 2 of them!!) And then to Starbucks. Elliot fell asleep in the stroller after lunch (around 12:30, I think) and slept until I got home just before 2. Good boy!

November 13, 2007

I'm debating whether to wean or tandem nurse. I want to do both, which isn't exactly possible. We're only nursing 3-4 times per day now - but one of those times is in the night. My supply is adequate at the moment. He takes whole milk in a sippy or bottle as well, but only in small amounts at a time (1-2 oz).

He's so rough that I'm not sure how easy it would be to nurse as this pregnancy progresses. I also am concerned how he will react to a new baby, especially one who is drinking HIS milk.

But I enjoy nursing. I don't want to loose the benefits or the closeness of it. But I can see how it will get more difficult as time passes.

I guess I should wait it out, see how my milk holds up... or I could drop that 4th nursing session (afternoon) and see how he does, gradually getting him down to twice per day (am & pm) and then waiting out the milk supply.

But what if I wean and then regret it? Re-lactation while prego can't be easy, and reintroducing it once the new baby arrives poses all kinds of other problems and questions.

*sigh*

Can someone just tell me what to do, please???

April 22, 2007

Elliot was 7 months old on Friday!! And the front right tooth that had been bulging for 2 months finally cut through that morning. i could feel the tip of it, but as the day went on, his gum swelled and the tip disappeared. Then it formed a nasty looking blister-type thing on top of the tooth. Then, as he was playing that afternoon, I saw blood in his mouth. Not a small amount, either. The blister had burst and there was a huge tooth there - it had descended quite a bit within the gum sheath. But there still was a tiny skim of skin over it, so it looked like a horribly disfigured broken, bloody nub.

I gave him ice chips in his mesh feeder (literally, a mesh bag on a handle into which you can put all sorts of food for baby to gnaw on safely) to chew on and soon after, the second blister broke. He bled everywhere again - more than the first time. I actually heard a snap, because he was chewing on my finger at the time, the little muffin. I gave him a cool cloth to chew on, and every time I took it out of his mouth, there was another spot of blood. Eeewie! I didn't think I was squeamish, but seeing my son's blood made me a bit weak.

I nursed him and gave him some baby Motrin and he seemed fine, but looking at the tooth, it was still a bloody nub. The swelling went down, but there was still a small flap of skin over part of the tooth. He didn't have any trouble at all with the bottom front teeth. I know the top ones can be terrible, but this seems very unusual. I did some research and found out that it's uncommon but not unheard of for blood blisters to form.

Blister #3 broke this morning. Jay was changing him and said that Elliot made a very different sounding cry and when Jay checked him, there was blood on his chin. We gave him another cool cloth to chew on and he seemed happy as can be. It looks like most of the tooth has cut through now - maybe only a tiny bit of skin left to break through on the far corner. He's such a trooper!

I hope the left front tooth, which isn't showing ANY signs of arriving soon, cuts through without all this fanfare.

February 16, 2007

Elliot had a marathon nursing session at 3am this morning, followed by scary huge coughing fit. He couldn't breathe and was turning purple and looking at Jay and I with big eyes just begging for help. Then there was a large, projectile, mucousy-milky vomit followed by more coughing. He finally settled down and slept ... Took him to Emergency at 11 am rather than his regular dr because I thought that a baby this young with such a bad cough and wheeze they might want to xray his lungs or something (as my friend's mother, who is a pediatric nurse, recommended.) ... But nope. Just listened to him and told me he was fine, but to bring him back if he got worse.

Feel very silly, but glad I got him checked out. He's had a phlegmy, harsh cough for 10 days and has been wheezing for 4... poor little muffin.

Santa and the melt down!

Despite his cold, we took Elliot to meet Santa yesterdayday. he hadn't pooped in 3 days, and sure enough, as we got in the line up, he filled his diaper! (and his clothes) so off we went to change him. by the time we got back, the line was quite long. we waited 20 minutes - Elliot was happy up until the last few minutes, then he started to get tired and hungry and cranky. we managed to get this pic - adorable!

we shopped for a couple more hours, and when we got home, he absolutely had a melt down. screaming, refusing to eat or sleep or anything. he seemed to be starving, so i tried every breast feeding position i could think of. (and i think i invented a few - jay came in the room to see me practically straddling Elliot, who was propped up on a pillow on the couch.) we tried breast milk in a bottle, we tried a finger-feeding tubing device, we finally put some milk in a dropper and squirted it into his mouth. he just screamed more. he seemed to be in pain (sore throat, most likely) so we gave him some tylenol. he calmed a bit, but was still VERY upset. (and i was in tears - thank god jay was home.) finally, after 2.5 hours, he latched on with me standing and supporting his butt on my leg which was braced on the bed (NOT comfy for mama, but he needed it.) he ate for 5 minutes then fell asleep.

too much stimulation + nasty cold = very upset little boy!!!

he's doing much better today. I got a full-fledged laugh out of him before bedtime!!! just melts your heart. and he ate very well before bed, so i'm hoping he'll be back to his usual 7-9 hours of sleep!!! (it's been every 3-4 hours since he's been sick - we're all VERY tired!)

November 22, 2006

Elliot had his first immunizations on Monday. I gave him 2 doses of Tylenol that day. Since then, he's been sleeping lots, and nursing slightly less. Today, he's still sleeping lots, but has been nursing every hour this afternoon, for 15-20 minutes each time, which is longer than his usual 8-12 minute feedings. He has had 2 smelly, dark yellow/green liquid poops. He's warm but doesn't have a fever. He doesn't seem overly fussy or lethargic and doesn't seem to be in pain.

The breast feeding clinic said this could be a delayed reaction to the shots or the Tylenol, or maybe due to something I ate, or maybe the start of the flu, and to keep an eye on him overnight. Poor boy!

In other news, he's quite the little chunk: 14 lbs and 24 inches long at 2 months old!

October 26, 2006

Our little porker weighs in at pretty much 12 lbs - he's gained 4 lbs in the 5 weeks he's been in the outside world!!

his stats:
8 lbs 12 oz at birth
8 lbs 3 oz on day 2
8 lbs 11 oz on day 5
9 lbs 15 oz on day 18
11 lbs 15 oz today, at 5 weeks 1 day old!

Jay has the camera at work with him, but i'll try to update with a recent pic soon... i can't believe his growth! and the scale at the hospital is for babies up to 23 inches long, and he was pretty much touching it end to end... and he was 20 1/4 at birth!

the nurse at the breastfeeding clinic figured that the screaming he was doing when i try to feed him is due to my crazy over-active let down practically drowning the poor boy. the milk literally sprays out everywhere... no wonder he was screaming and pulling away! she gave me some tips on how to control that, so we'll see what happens in the next few days.

Breastfeeding woes...

As per the nurse at the breatfeeding clinic, i'm block feeding - i alternate sides for new feedings, every 2-4 hours, depending on demand, instead of switching to the other side mid-feed. yesterday, Elliot would nurse as usual on the right side (without the nipple shied, yay!), but when it came time to switch sides for the next feeding, he would nurse with the shield for 3-5 minutes, then start screaming. i could relatch him, but he'd suck 1-2 times then start screaming again. even calming him, burping him and the starting over would end the same way.

i've tried different holding positions and tried with and without the shield on the left side - no luck. i know it's not a supply issue, since i pumped the left after a screaming fit and got 5 oz from that side. he would be frantically giving hunger cues and i don't think it's pain related, since i switched him to the right side mid-screaming fit and he latched and nursed like normal - so i know he wasn't full!

so what do i do? i see 3 options - keep battling it out with him and hope he catches on again, always feed from the right but pump the left at each feeding and store it for later use, or keep up the block feeding - but pumping and bottle feeding from the left every time. i'm trying to get back in to the breast feeding clinic to see what they say/suggest, but that may take a few days... frustrating!

March 14, 2006

13w1d, 136 lbs

Had our second prenatal on the 10th and got to hear the heartbeat. I cried. Such an amazing experience! The baby at first was directly below my bellybutton, closer to the pubic bone and we got to hear the heart - 144 beats per minute - for a bit, then the baby moved about an inch to the right. She chased him/her with the doppler so we could keep listening. So we have a happy, healthy & active baby in there!

I went to a "Preparing for Birth" workshop over the weekend. Our doula gave a talk as well as an obstetrics student who brought all kinds of scary instruments with her. There was a nutrition talk and some prenatal yoga.

I was quite freaked out by the scary instruments. I didn't realize how terrified I was/am about having anything put up inside me to assist with the birth. I'm also still scared of having a miscarriage, although at 13 weeks, the chances of that happening now are diminished.

I'm meeting with our doula later this week to talk about these fears. I know they will effect the pregnancy and delivery if they're not dealt with soon.

Our doula is really nice. I feel comfortable with her. She will be supposrting all of us - me, Jay & baby - during the labour. She will develop our birth plan and help ensure the doctor's follow it, if possible. She told us about something called the "Breast Crawl" - just after birth, the baby is put on the mother's stomach. Since the baby is covered with (and has been feeding on) amniotic fluid, s/he will recognize the same hormone that is secreted from the nipples during labour. The baby will then slowly sort of crawl up to the breast and begin to nurse.

This would be the baby's first out-of-womb experience with self-esteem and would be an incredible bonding time. Also, the motion of the baby's tiny feet on the stomach as s/he pushes forward would help the uterus contract to push out the afterbirth!

So cool!